The start of a new year is typically an opportunity to set goals and commit to new resolutions with optimism. Yet last week’s violence at the U.S. Capitol building left many of us feeling uncertain, angry, and sad. We are outraged by the racial disparities and hate symbols that were on display. And at the same time, our work has never been more important. At Acknowledge Alliance, we’re dedicated to lifelong resilience and are committed to meeting the new year with renewal and hope for change. We can all help restore our collective sense of community and our social fabric so that the disturbing events we witnessed last week never happen again.
We believe that self-reflection is one of the many tools and actions within our control. With all that's going on right now, we want to validate that it’s normal to feel overwhelmed at times, and if you feel unsure about the future, you’re not alone. We’d like to encourage everyone to practice self-compassion - to treat yourself with kindness, the way you would a good friend, when facing a setback or disappointment.
Self-compassion is the ability to respond to and support yourself with understanding, acceptance, and love. Mindfulness can help turn compassion inwards by acknowledging your thoughts and feelings without trying to suppress or deny them. Instead of beating yourself up and engaging in negative self-talk, be gentle and refrain from harsh criticism. The recognition of our shared common humanity, the fact that all people are imperfect and experience pain, serves as a reminder that we’re not alone in this and that life’s challenges are all a part of being human.
When people treat themselves with compassion rather than criticism, they are more likely to experience greater physical and mental health. Research shows that people who are more self-compassionate are happier, less stressed, more confident, and more resilient. Self-compassion has been connected with helping people experience less anxiety, shame, and depression. Practicing self-compassion also leads to more gratitude and better relationships with others.
Self-compassion is an important part of having a strengths-based outlook, which is a core value here at Acknowledge Alliance. Recently we had the opportunity to lead a self-compassion session for Sunnyvale School District educators. We also create a safe space to focus on self-compassion in our Teacher and Principal Resilience Groups. A teacher shared how this helped her grow professionally: “I learned how to be more self-compassionate at work. This has helped me let go and reflect more effectively without getting down on myself. I have noticed myself having more self-confidence, which has allowed me to support my students and my colleagues better.”
What self-compassion practices can you add into regular routines? One self-compassion exercise we ask students to do in Project Resilience, our social emotional learning lessons, is to create a gratitude journal. In addition to writing 3 things you’re grateful for, can you also name a bonus thing you are grateful for about yourself? You can also take a self-compassion break or simply ask yourself, “What do I need right now?” Then, do something simple but nice for yourself like listen to your favorite song, video chat with friends, or go for a walk. Remember that we get stronger when we’re kinder to ourselves, and every day is a new chance to have a fresh start.