Eleanor Rosa Lammoglia-Morel, Judith Gable, Dr. Meag-gan O'Reilly, and Gladys Gudino
At our Forget-Me-Not event earlier this month, our panel of experts shared how youth from marginalized and socioeconomically high-need communities are dealing with more trauma and adversity than ever before. From coping with unresolved grief and loss, domestic violence and substance abuse issues within their households, the oppressive forces of poverty and racism, to uncertainty around immigration status and possible family separation, students in our community are facing unimaginable challenges to their success. Panelists discussed how despite these adversities, resilience can be cultivated and young people can thrive when they are given the compassionate support they need.
The panel was moderated by Collaborative Counseling Program Director, Dr. Kristal Navarro, and included Judith Gable, LCSW (CCP Clinical Supervisor and Consultant), Gladys Gudino (CCP Psychotherapist), Eleanor Rosa Lammoglia-Morel (CCP Psychotherapist), and Dr. Meag-gan O’Reilly (psychologist, self-worth expert, DEI Consultant, and Co-Founder of Inherent Value Psychology INC). As part of the discussion, members of our CCP team shared valuable insights from their work with clients:
“When they’re in pain, the way they express their pain...often gets them punished, ignored, or kicked out of places… And to be able to sit down with them in this very intimate sanctuary that we create as therapists, where nobody else gets to hear it, and they get to hear and experience themselves in this caring, non-judgemental relationship where we’re not shocked or put off by what they’re doing..they start to understand and get some insight into what they actually feel and think. They get the space and time to reflect, and it’s gorgeous. Many people don’t get to see these youth in this way. They just see the defiant, rebellious, ‘f- you’ kids, and that’s not who they are underneath it all. The ‘I don’t give a f-’ is really, ‘I can’t dare to care because there’s nobody that’s going to take care of me and catch me when I fall.’” - Judith Gable, CCP Clinical Supervisor and Consultant
“A lot of these kids have never had anyone say anything positive about them or if they have it’s just been lost in a wash of insults or general sense of ‘you are not enough.’ When I first see a client my goal is first to get to know them as a person and not ask those hard questions of ‘what kind of trauma have you experienced’ right away. That will come out on its own. It helps to make the child feel heard and understood and also to feel like you’re not out here trying to make them seem stupid which I think they get a lot of in the classroom where they’re not excelling and where they’re struggling to even attend. They’re not just telling me about the terrible things in their life but that I care about the things that make them happy too.” - Eleanor Rosa Lammoglia-Morel, CCP Psychotherapist
Eleanor Rosa Lammoglia-Morel, Judith Gable, Dr. Meag-gan O'Reilly, and Gladys Gudino
Dr. Meag-gan O'Reilly also shared her thoughts on how we need to reconsider our current definition of resilience and how it affects students.
“Resilience is actually about recovery, but at least in how we use it nowadays, today we use it like the word “persevere” or “endure”... so students feel this pressure to be resilient. They think they just have to make a way out of no way and keep mushing through. That’s not resilience. Resilience is “recover, replenish and restore.” It’s actually about maybe even taking a break and replenishing. So it’s a little bit of a paradigm shift we need to think about when we use that word and how it’s actually landing on our students.” - Dr. Meag-gan O’Reilly, Psychologist, self-worth expert, DEI Consultant, and Co-Founder of Inherent Value Psychology INC
View the full panel discussion and check out recordings of the rest of the event on our Youtube channel!